Guess Who's Coming to Dinner

Guess who’s coming to dinner… You guessed it.. Chipotle and Churches. Saturday was date night in the City. Chipotle and I took a couple of hot guys out to dinner. When I say “we” took “them” out to dinner, I mean we picked the restaurant and they paid. Hey fellas next time dinner is on us ..promise

The restaurant of our choosing.. Fiorella’s Jack Stack Barbecue… if you’re ever in Kansas City, stop by any of their locations. The baked beans are to die for   .. 2nd best  bbq joint in the City.. I am a little partial to Gates BBQ… I think I just enjoy having people yell at me as soon as I enter their establishment. If you’ve ever been to Gates in Kansas City then you know what I am talking about. Before you even get a chance to look at the menu or utter your order, you are met with the famous, “Hi May I Help You!!”… this greeting is normally shouted, making you completely forget the whole reason you were there in the first place.

Dinner was delish.. but the dinner conversation was the highlight of the evening. It all started with our dinner party trying to figure out the nationality of our waiter. Many guesses were made and all of them were WRONG… so to put our eager minds at rest we finally asked him… and the answer.. Cambodian. This guy didn’t look like any Cambodian I had ever seen.  When I think about someone of Cambodian heritage I think of something like this ok I know that is very stereotypical of me but thats what came to mind (DJM)..   instead we got something like this … ok I exaggerate a little but he was not what I had imagine.

Typical dinner conversation ensued until I was introduced to the term “Dirty Sanchez”.. First I would like to apologize in advance to anyone name Sanchez.. Clean, Dirty or otherwise. Believe me when I tell you that I was completely taken off guard when I heard this. For those of you who do not know what this is… I’ll try to explain as best I can without breaking out into a full on laugh attack and thus not finishing my story… okay…………………. Sorry I had to take a break and get all the giggles out before I could finish. So without further ado… 

A Dirty Sanchez is when someone sticks their finger in their bum  hole and wipe the contents across someone else’s upper lip to make a mustache. Now while the act itself is gross to say the least … the mere thought of it gives me the giggles… who in there right mind would do such a thing… I can only think that this would happen to the person bold enough to try

at least that would be my reaction if I was on the receiving end of a Dirty Sanchez…

The other wonderful term I was introduced to over dinner was “Donkey Punched” Now unlike the Dirty Sanchez this requires actual physical contact. A Donkey Punched is something you do while engaged in sexual intercourse. While engaged in sex in the “Doggy Style” position, the giver proceeds to literally punch the receiver in the back of the head. This is done to increase sexual arousal.. … nothing about that is going to get me aroused… Please see image above if your not sure what a Donkey Punch will get you…

Needless to say dinner was good and I learned a very valuable lesson… Never have dinner with Chipotle (unless she’s paying)